Thailand Cultural Etiquette

What is Etiquette?

Etiquette is a set of customs and rules for polite behavior, especially among a particular class of people (or in a business setting).

Don’ts

• Don’t throw things: Tossing an object or money in someone’s direction is considered rude. Take your time to hand things to people properly. When handing someone money in a transaction, have the money unfolded, face-up and it is preferred to hand it to them using your right hand (not left).
• Don’t touch someone’s head: While the feet are considered the lowest and dirtiest parts of the body, the head is revered as the most sacred. Never touch someone’s head or hair – this includes playfully ruffling a child’s hair. Don’t raise your feet above someone’s head; avoid stepping over people who are sitting or sleeping on the ground.
• Don’t point your finger: Pointing at someone is considered rude in many cultures but particularly so in Thailand. If you must indicate a person, do so by lifting your chin in their direction. When motioning for someone to come over, don’t use fingers pointed upward; make a patting motion with your fingers straight and palm toward the ground. Pointing at inanimate objects and animals is usually acceptable, but it’s more polite to point with your entire hand rather than a single finger.
• Don’t point your feet: Pointing your feet at someone, raising your feet higher than someone’s head, or simply putting your feet on a desk or chair are considered extremely rude in Thailand. The bottoms of the feet are dirty: don’t show them to people! Avoid pointing feet at Buddhas in and outside of temples. When sitting on the ground, try to sit in a way that doesn’t show others the bottoms of your feet.
• Don’t lose your temper: Shouting, blowing your top, or displaying strong emotions is generally frowned upon in Thailand. Remember while traveling in Asia, their concept of allowing someone to “save face.” Meaning do not do anything to correct or shame someone in front of others. Even if you feel your claim is correct, try to resolve the issue quietly to prevent the other person from losing face (from public embarrassment). Keep your cool even when things go wrong; you’ll be respected for doing so.
• Don’t disrespect the king (or Royal Family in Thailand): Never disrespect the king or images of the king, this includes currency – his picture appears on the Thai baht. Open disrespect toward the king (or the royal family) can have you end up in prison! People have even received lengthy prison sentences for writing Facebook posts speaking out against the monarchy.
• Don’t step on the threshold when entering someone’s home, a temple, restaurant, or other business establishment. Instead step over the threshold.

Do’s

• Remove your shoes: As in many Asian cultures, removing your shoes before entering a temple or visiting someone’s home is essential. Some businesses, restaurants, and shops also ask that you remove your shoes. If unsure, just look to see if there is a pile of shoes at the entrance or check to see if the staff are wearing shoes. This is why best to wear simple footwear (such as flip flops) in Thailand and other parts of Southeast Asia.
• Return a wai: The wai is Thailand’s prayer-like gesture with the hands together in front and head slightly bowed. To not return a wai is considered impolite; only the king and monks do not have to return wais. Try not to wai while holding something in your hands; a slight bow will suffice. You might also learn to say hello in Thai.

• Use your right hand: The left hand is considered dirty, as it is sometimes used for “toilet functions.” Always use your right hand to pass objects to someone and when paying. Touch your left hand to your right forearm (showing that it is safely out of reach) if you wish to show extra respect.
• Eat with a spoon:  The way that Thai people eat their dishes is to use a a spoon in their right hand, and use a fork in their left hand. The fork is used to simply rake the food into the spoon. They never put the fork in their mouths. They rarely use chopsticks. Chopsticks are usually only used for the noodle dishes or to pick up eggrolls or fried banana.
• Show respect to monks:  As you encounter monks in places like Chiang Mai; treat them with respect. When greeting a monk, be sure to show respect, and monks receive a higher wai than ordinary people; monks do not have to return your gesture. Women should never touch a monk, brush a monk’s robes, or hand something to a monk. Monks should be allowed to eat first at ceremonies and gatherings. Monks in Thailand are commonplace – you’ll sometimes see them using smartphones and in internet cafes! I saw a monk at the Grand Palace in Bangkok taking a selfie. That was unexpected.
• Smile: The “Thai smile” is famous, essential to Thailand etiquette, and Thais show it whenever they can. Always return someone’s smile. Smiles are used ​in an apology, in negotiations, to relax whenever something goes not as planned, and just in everyday life.

Temple Etiquette

Visiting temples in Thailand is a must for every trip, however, many tourists shy away from interesting places such as the Tunnel Temple in Chiang Mai because they don’t understand Buddhism or the local customs. Below are some things to remember regarding temple etiquette. 

Photo taken by Rosita Lee inside the Tunnel Temple in Chiang Mai, Thailand

When visiting temples in Thailand, remember to:

• Be Quiet (people may be worshiping, this is a holy place)
• Remove your shoes (Shoes are covered in dust and mud. Removing them represents your intention to cleanse yourself physically and spiritually before entering this holy place)
• Dress Modestly (shoulders and knees must be covered)
• Watch your feet (Try not to accidentally point your feet toward worshipers. Sit lotus position, or sit with your needs bent so you are sitting on your feet, so your feet are pointing behind you.)
• Be a Respectful Photographer (if photography is allowed, avoid using flash during ceremonies or when a service is going occurring).
• Show Respect to Buddha Images (try not to turn your back to a buddha image).
• Show Respect to Monks (you should not be seated higher than a monk. If you pass by a seated monk and you are standing, you should lower yourself to be lower than the monk).
• Bow (When you enter the temple, you should kneel resting on your heels and bow three times to acknowledge and honor the triple gems: the Buddha, the Dharma and the Sangha. Raise your hands in prayer to your forehead, bow forward from your hips and press your hands and head to the floor. Repeat three times, when you arrive and when you leave).
  
  Practitioners of Buddhism profess to take refuge in these three foundations of their faith. Honoring the Buddha is, of course, the first and central priority – and not only the Buddha himself, but the enlightenment that he embodies. The second bow acknowledges the Dharma, the Buddha’s teachings, which state that following the Four Noble Truths will release a person from fear and ignorance. The third shows reverence and gratitude to the Sangha, the community of monks, nuns, Buddhist teachers who share Buddhist wisdom with their followers.

• Look but don’t touch (Don’t touch the art on the walls, the altar, the Buddha image, or any monk).
• Don’t disturb the worship (Don’t overdo the photographs, and refrain from talking. This could disturb those who have come here for their daily worship and are not sightseeing).
• Put your phone on silent (or turn it off) while in a Buddhist temple.

Dining Etiquette

Below are some things to remember when dining in Thailand or if invited to someone’s house for dinner.

• Remove your shoes when entering someone’s home.
• Avoid stepping directly on the threshold (instead step over it).
• Eat food with a spoon and fork (but put the spoon in your mouth, not the fork).
• Some Thai dishes are eaten with your fingers. If you eat with your fingers, make sure you use your right hand (which is considered your “clean” hand).
• Never lick your fingers after eating.
• Do not eat all the food on your place. Leave one or two bites of food to indicate to the host that you are full. If you eat everything on your place, it could indicate to the host that you are still hungry, which could be taken that the host did not serve enough food. This could cause the host to lose face. So proper dinner etiquette is to leave a bite or two on your place. You might not matter so much if you are eating out at a restaurant.
• Wait for the host to seat you at a private dinner party, since seating is arranged by social hierarchy. So wait for the host to introduce you and tell you where to sit.

Business Etiquette

Business etiquette in Thailand is very formal and very hierarchical. Business relations usually form slowly after a few meeting to build up trust, because any business transaction is completed.

Show respect of Thai culture, and politeness. Pay close attention to non-verbal communication. Sometimes you have to read between the lines.

• Make meeting appointments at least one month in advance. Punctuality is very important.
• Wear appropriate business attire. Men are expected to wear dark colored business suits, and women are expected to wear conservative suit, blouse, or business dress.
• Business cards are important, and should be exchanged using your right hand. After you receive a business card, you should look at it for a few minutes, then put it neatly in your wallet or purse.
• If handing out business cards, you should give it to the person of the highest social status first.
• Remember to always show respect, humility and be of good humor. Avoid displaying any negative emotions.

Gift Etiquette

Gift giving is usually informal, except for weddings or other special occasions. Gifts should be in simple, neat gift wrapping.

• Don’t wrap gifts in colors used for funerals (which are black, blue, or green). These colors should be avoided since they are associated with morning. Unless your gift is related to a funeral.
• Do wrap your gift in Red, which is a favorite color of Chinese Thais. Or gift can be wrapped in any color other than the funeral colors (black, blue, or green).
• It is not common for Thais to open a gift in front of the giver. So don’t be offended if they wait to open your gift later, that is the norm.
• Fruit, flowers, candy or chocolate are always safe gift choices. You can also give books, stationery, or liquors. Use your judgement about what you think your host would prefer or find useful.
• If you are invited to someone’s home, a gift is not mandatory. However, a small token gift is usually appreciated.